“I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws.” Ezekiel 36:26 – 27 (NIV)
Somehow I had bought into it. Believed that if I did everything “right”, my kids would all turn out “right”. I’m not quite sure why I thought kids’ lives were the same as the math equations I taught them each day. If I stayed at home, added extra Bible reading and memorizing, factored in our church commitment – voila! The end result would be kids who were crazy about Jesus. That’s how it worked in my life, so isn’t that how it worked?
The part I didn’t allow for was free will. So when that free will started to become apparent in the life of our first born, I was thrown off. To be more honest, I wanted to hide. Doubt and questions about faith scared me. I wanted to yell “Just believe!”
That is when Jesus taught me, “You wrote your own story with me. Now it’s time for your kids to write their individual stories with Me.” That is when my perspective on raising God-loving children really changed.
Yes, since that revelation I’ve continued to pour God’s truth into my children’s’ lives, but I am more intentional now. Instead of seeing them as empty vessels that are my responsibility to fill, I see them as God’s children on a journey of discovering Him just like I did. And while their path might look similar to mine, it most likely will not. My kids are individuals and God will draw them in a way as unique as they are.
To make this sound easy would be a far cry from truth. There have been many early mornings and late nights of tears, wishing I could write their stories. I haven’t liked some of the turns. Some twists in the road have been down right terrifying, but I am learning every day, if their hearts are going to change, only Jesus can do it.
As I look up today’s key verse, I see a date many years ago scrawled in my Bible. No doubt from one of those early mornings with Jesus. My time to pray and reinforce His promises in my heart. It is there, with Him daily, I am reminded He can bring a heart change. He can give a new heart; a new spirit.
WHAT ABOUT YOU?
Have you given much thought to what God expects of you as a parent, versus the areas that are really more His job? Maybe like me, you’ve thought of kids as 2 + 2 = 4.
Make a list in the comments of things you think are your job, and ask God what’s your responsibility and what ultimately is His.
Throughout the day, pray the ten scripture prayers found at the end of the Heart Change chapter!
Lynn Cowell is a Proverbs 31 speaker and the author of several books including her newest Magnetic: Becoming the Girl He Wants. Her passion in speaking and writing is empowering wise women to raise wiser daughters. Her husband and their three children live in North Carolina where they love to hike, raft and enjoy anything combining chocolate and peanut butter.
Just joining us? Simply subscribe to the MOB Society blog now. That way, the 21 Days of Prayer for Sons posts will come straight to your inbox all month long!
Wow, this I exactly what I have been going through with my boys. Its amazing! “You wrote your own story with me. Now it’s time for your kids to write their individual stories with Me.” spoke straight to my heart. I’ve been so concerned about them getting into God’s word and in a way forcing them. After reading this I now know, I just have to take a step back and just guide them reminding myself everyday that “they are God’s children on a journey of discovering Him just like I did.” Thank you for sharing
My son isn’tyet 2 so I haven’t dealt with much free will besides pushing his plate away when he chose not to eat. I’ve never had to deal with him questioning his faith as he doesn’t yet have the capability to understand it.As I parent my son I see my job as a shepherd, I’m to watch over him and keep him safe to the best of my ability. I’m to be a Godly role model for him and guide him to Christ. I pray on a daily basis for my son, for his salvation and his heart. I pray that just as he runs to me and calls for Mama, he’ll run to God and say Father. I pray that he will grow strong in God’s grace and that’s he’ll be the person God has designed him to be. As his parent I believe it’s my job to pray for his spouse, though he is many years away from marriage, I must pray for her salvation as well. I believe God will reveal to my son who he is supposed to be. Truth be told I haven’t given much thought to what God’s job is in raising my son…..I’ll have to start praying for that to be revealed to me.
What book are you referring to that includes the ten scripture prayers?
Praying for Boys: Asking God for the Things They Need Most. The challenge is based on this book 🙂
it is scary, I sometimes close my eyes as I see my children walk with God. I see them walk on the very edge, get distracted by the trees and then return to center skipping alongside God. Watching this is scary. I want to yell stay n the middle, don’t stop, keeping walking, focus!! It’s true they have their own story to write with God. It belongs to them and God. I’ve prayed that their faith would be their own. May I give them seeds but may their hands and face be dirty as they get busy planting them. May they workout their own stories with our God.
Far too many days have been spent carrying loads God never intended for me to carry. I have been like you thinking if I do all these things then my kids will be godly children. Glad to know I’m not the only mom who struggles with this. Going to begin asking The Lord what he expects of me and leave the rest up to him….is there any way ypu could add the ten prayers at the end of the posts for those who didn’t purchase the book?
Oh yes. I also carry many burdens that the Lord never planned I should carry. I tend to be a “get it done” type of person and the area of raising my four children (3 are boys) is no different. I am SO thankful for this Godly wisdom to let Him take hold of these burdens. I must stand in the gap and pray like I never have before, but I can do that. What I can’t do anymore is bear the burden of each soul and each character issue. Thank you Jesus.
Making my kids obey. Making them be kind to each other. Making them love each other. Making them do their school work (we homeschool). Making them pray and read their Bible. I’m sure there are others. But that is my quick list. God, please help me to remember that I’m responsible for setting a godly example and the conviction of sin and the way they are to individually follow you is left to Holy Spirit. Help me to be the example I want them to see of your love, patience, kindness, gentleness, self-control, joy, peace. I am weak but you are strong.
I feel responsible for every are of my boys lives. We a have been going through a very difficult time with our older boys and I am finally coming to grips with the reality that I am not able to change their hearts. Free will is becoming my nemesis right now. Decisions the boys are making are hurting them and I can see the eventual consequences but they dont. Only God can do this. Lord I pray that you would change their hearts. I know that I alone am not strong enough to have them turn around. Please help to be a good example to them. I am giving this up to you Lord, I am weak. Please help my boys.
I have four older children over the age of 20, they live good lives, most are still in church and love the Lord. We have 3 younger ones at home still…. and I have learned over the past year (guess I’m a slow learner) that regardless of how strict or careful we are with what our kids do, watch, read, etc…. (which is all good, and needed) that if their hearts are not turned towards God’s no rules will really matter. It must be a heart change and a drawing of their hearts to the Father. I’m excited for the next 21 days!
I am so happy to hear that I am not the only mom who struggles with this. I have bought each one of my children their own devotion telling myself, we need to take the time and read these each day and when that doesn’t happen I am guilty, I feel like I am not being the mother I “should” be. When we miss church or yoth group when life turns crazy, I feel like I am not being the mom aonce again that I was called to be. But this mornign as I was doing my devotion with my challenge group, I read an interestong post that realy hit home, they spoke about how we “try” to be perfect in God with our kidsm but we need to realize we are “NOT” perfect and that we just need to do what fits best when teaching our kids about Jesus. I know I am amazed at what my kids now and how they hold Jesus close to their heart when I feel I am doing a horrible job. Lord, I come to you today and ask you to lead me to be the mom you want me to be, what are my responsibilites and please Lord tell me what to give up, remind me YOU CAN and WILL DO IT all and I can STOP trying to think I have to.
I’ve spent many years trying to control my boys in ways that I can’t and aren’t even my responsibility. I believe that the Lord loves my boys even more than I do and that He will work in their lives for their good. I need to live that reality through prayer instead of trying to force the changes I want.
Heart Change. Something I know, and believe, to be critical. But, re-reading this chapter and re-praying the prayers from the perspective that “I” CANNOT do that for my children, no matter how hard I try … this is God’s job. I took it over a long time ago and He wants it back!
My almost 10-year-old son has entered into a new phase and I constantly feel it is my responsibility to make sure he is happy, feels accepted by peers, desires to learn about God, is not overactive. I need the Lord to help me just be his mom. To love him and show love even when he is driving me crazy and give my control issues over to God so that He may work in my son’s life for the purpose that He has for my son.
I see that my job is to love the boys, lead by example, bring God’s message into their hearts, and God’s job is to love them – in a way that only God can love, His job is to speak to the through the Holy Spirit and have the spirit be their guide, His job is to show them He is alive and present in their lives. While my boys are young, these are my hopes and prayers for me to do and for God to do in their live. I need to start now, but why not pray BIG!!
dildos
A Heart Change (21 Days of Prayer for Sons)
Pure Garcinia Reviews
A Heart Change (21 Days of Prayer for Sons)
the article says to pray the ten scripture prayers found at the end of the chapter of A heart of prayer….but I dont see them??
I have a 1 week old son so for him the responsibility is focused on nurturing, meeting basic needs. Yet I need to already be praying for his soul, that he would have a love for Jesus and people. And so much more….which brings me to my 4 yr old son. I feel overwhelmed these days and that I have way too high expectations for his behavior (in ither words I want control). I feel I’m failing at showing him Jesus everyday; in my life, how I act/react, etc….as well as simply teaching him basic Bible stories. I believe that is my responsibility- to love him, extend grace and discipline gently but firmly and let Jesus shine in my life, God will do the great works in his life.
Thank you for this post. For moms wanting other moms to join them in praying for their boys on a regular basis, I recommend Moms in Prayer International (www.MomsInPrayer.org). I don’t know what I’d do without the mom-friends I’ve made who have prayed with me over the years for my now grown son. Now they also pray with me for his wife. What a gift!
my expectations of myself and my two young boys have been out of proportion. I need to hand over everything right now to God and wait to hear what is my role…I believe I should be working harder to set a better example of Christlike love instead of trying to have everything under control.