Learning with boys {Homeschooling}

By on September 9, 2011 in homeschool, School

Learning with boys is a bit different than learning with girls; a little bit more rollicking, a bit topsy-turvy, a whole lot of movement and add in can’t-sit-still-itis.  My subject roster looks the same, but the execution needs a bit of creativity and understanding.

To keep everyone happy while learning, I’ve stumbled on a few tricks:

  • Keep it short: Subjects and or/study periods/homework periods should stay short, 15-20 minutes for young boys.  When their eyes start to glaze over, or the feet start to jump- move on to a totally different subject or take a short break.
  • A short play break will deliver boys ready to pay better attention.  This works in Sunday School, also.
  • If he can’t stop fidgeting, do him and yourself a favor and give him something to channel that energy into.  Some moms let a very busy boy sit on an exercise ball and bounce a bit during read aloud time, sometimes silly putty in the hand or play-dough does wonders.  I often let my boys draw while I read.
  • Alternates subjects and plan the next one to be different than the first.  If you are doing handwriting move on to something more mental such as reading or spelling.
  • Pick reading books that will appeal to your boy’s sense of adventure and will strengthen his sense of honor.  Thrills are good, too.

Our current boy picks:

  • Farmer Boy
  • Encyclopedia Brown
  • The Mysterious Benedict Society
  • Lion Boy
  • How to Eat Fried Worms
  • Little Men, Jo’s Boys
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follow the leader

By on August 10, 2011 in connection with boys, growing godly men, homeschool

 

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Some boys are born leaders, while other boys naturally follow a leader.  My job is to paint a picture of what a good leader is, without preaching.  My favorite resource? Literature.

Strong leaders in children’s literature include:

  • Dickon from The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett. Dickon is strong, healthy, older/wiser and kind to animals.  He is a gentle friend.  By contrast, the boy Colin is young, spoiled, crabby, weak, indifferent, unkind.
  • Nicholas Nickleby by Charles Dickens.  Nicholas is intelligent, well-educated, goes out into the world to take care of his mother and sister, is kind to others.  He goes out of his way to be kind to others. He hates greed, sin and injustice.
  • Encyclopedia Brown.  He is boy genius, but does not lord it over the other children.  He does not go out of his way to embarrass his foes.  He works to help others who are taken advantage of.
  • Capricorn “Cap” Anderson in the book “Schooled” by Gordon Korman. This book is about a very naive homeschooled boy who is raised alone on a hippie commune.  When his grandmother is injured, he is suddenly thrown into the world of modern middle school.  We can guess what it is like…the popular kids make him class president to torture and humiliate him, but- his kindness, braveness and fairness turn the tide.  Most of the school admires him in the end.
  • Summer of the Monkeys: Jay Berry has more typical faults, but works hard to earn money for a pony. In the end, he does the agonizing, right thing, denying himself.

Stories with the anti-leader:

  • The Emperor’s New Clothes -the classic story done with animals. How not to be a leader, and how not to be a follower.
  • Artemis Fowl -a boy not to admire. While it is tempting to admire his genius (he’s Encyclopedia Brown with evil schemes) the feelings he will provoke are pity.
  • Little Men and Jo’s Boys-Louisa May Alcott- filled with boys, jolly good times, and boys to admire and boys who grow up not conquering their biggest weaknesses.  A fun tale with warnings to the wise boy.

I love sharing a story well-told to my boys because the lessons and characters will stay will them, long after any talk I could give.  A good story becomes part of them and will continue instructing them long after the last page is turned.  Truths wrapped in a fun tale can reach a boy’s heart and catch them in unguarded moments of reflection.  A story told well is my favorite teaching tool.

Of course, all good stories lead to the best story of all, and to a Christ that was the ultimate leader: one who was willing to lay down His life for his friends.

Classic literature is full of hero’s who reflect Christ. Share them and let your boy make the connections.

What are your favorite hero stories for boys?

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I Spy {someone is always watching me}

By on July 12, 2011 in growing godly men, Life Lessons

Parenting is so much more difficult and more complicated than I had ever imagined.  You’ve heard the quip, “I was an expert at parenting before I had children!” Yes, that kind of sums it up for me!

As my children grow older and more aware, I am reminded again and again- that my everyday life and actions are teaching my children something…and that I need to be sober-minded about exactly what those lessons might be.

In our home, we strive to uphold truth and honesty.  We teach it, preach it, praise it and model it.  Frankly, though, it’s the million everyday actions lived out- that will impact our boys, so much more than our words.

Integrity involves truthfulness in our living and in our words.  Integrity involves keeping promises, doing what we say we will do, following through.  Integrity is proved out [or not] in the many small things that we are tempted to easily overlook or sweep under a rug.  Our boys, however, do see what we do.  We are masters at explaining some of these slips of conscience away in our minds, but do we really want to teach our sons to be so easily dishonest in the small things?

“Wherefore putting away lying, speak every man truth with his neighbor…” -Ephesians 4:25

“provide things honest in the sight of all men.” -Romans 12:17

“…but let your yes be yes, and your no, no, lest you fall under judgement.” -James 5:12

For your consideration:  if you fudge on your child’s birth date so he can have a facebook page, are you chipping away at your own integrity in his eyes?  Does the end result (a fun facebook page) really justify the means (dishonesty)?  If you sneak snacks into the movie theater, even though a sign at the entrance says “no outside food or drink?” what are you teaching?

Everyday, as parents, we are faced with these tiny, little choices.  These tiny little choices will add up to a weight of truthfulness and integrity.

Integrity for our boys will not start in college, when he decides whether or not to cite a reference for a term paper.  I’ve learned that integrity starts at home, with the little eyes that are always watching me.

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Safely His

By on June 10, 2011 in a mother's heart, Life Lessons

My children really are not mine, they belong to my heavenly Father.  I knew this/understood this- intellectually, but at one point I realized I had not experienced this in reality.

I am the mom who hovers. I drop my children off for a lesson, and I wait in the studio.  I leave them in a new place and I come back- face pressed to the window, to make sure that all is well.  Some of this for good reason; as I child I met the monsters in sheep’s clothing – and so, I take my job as gate-keeper, as protector, very seriously.

And yet, I know that I cannot control the world.  I cannot protect them from every hurt, every discomfort, every tragedy- by my vigilance alone.  I am reminded that my life is in the palms of  a loving maker, and so are my children’s.

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.” Hebrews 11:1

Years ago, I sat in a hospital bed a day after giving birth to our fourth child.  The cardiologist exited the room, and I sat there with a fearful and confused heart because of what he came to tell me.  Our daughter had two minor heart defects- but one of them I had some experience with, because a relative had it.  I knew that my relative could have no more children.  I knew my relative faced possible surgery for a valve replacement as it wore out.  I sat in fear and grief for the alternate future my baby now had.  I sat and stewed, and cried, and prayed- and even had a panic attack.

Later, I heard that still small voice.  A choice was before me.  Would I give over my children’s futures begrudgingly or with open, thankful and trusting hands? Intellectually I knew my children belonged to God, but this situation showed clearly that in reality, I still had a very tight hold on them.  There was a door I needed my heart to walk through; and because I knew, loved and trusted my Master- the decision was made: my world shifted and I walked through, giving Him my children with open, willing hands.

That was 9 years ago.  This weekend, my son will travel with his new Royal Rangers group to a pow-wow.  It will be gloriously all-boy, all adventure and all dirt.  Mom is not invited.

I promise to not look back.

“I will both lie down in peace, and sleep; For You alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety.” Psalm 4:8

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