Faith Meeting Life

By on October 20, 2010 in growing godly men

Glancing up, the sight of his shoulders caught me by surprise. They are getting broader, as is his chest. He is starting to become more modest, and I am noticing a distinct change in his maturity. He is growing up. I know he’s only ten, but I am seeing the changes happening right before my eyes. It might be the sleep patterns that are emerging, or the fact that his feet are now into men’s sizes, or the fact that his prayers are becoming more thoughtful. What ever it is, there is no ignoring the fact that my son is heading for adolescence.

And he’s got enough to deal with already. “Developmentally delayed” they say. True, he is, but not overwhelmingly so. He doesn’t  mesh too well with kids his own age, but he does great with babies through preschoolers, and with teens. The younger ones just love the attention, and the older ones understand him. The kids his age sometimes just don’t know how to take him. He will need to know what he believes, and why he believes it. He will need to have compassion for others his age even when some may not have compassion or patience for him.

Sometimes it breaks this Momma’s heart to think of what lies ahead for him. I keep looking back at the previous ten years, and asking myself, “Have I done enough?” My faith is a witness to my sons. My prayers are necessary for their growth and guidance in the Lord, and my time is important to their everyday development. I don’t know if I have done enough. I don’t know if I’m missing something absolutely crucial, but the Lord does, and He hears my prayers.

I keep thinking about what I want him to know, and how I want him to take on the world, and I feel like I fall short on knowledge. Is he polite enough? Does he care, and does he think of others first? Is his heart seeking the Lord?  Have I been a good teacher and have I shown him the way?  Soon enough, it will all be his decision. Once puberty hits, and that independence begins to assert itself, everything he HAS BEEN taught will either gel, or fall away.

Our morning devotions bring God’s Word into their lives, and evening prayers bring other’s needs into their thoughts and their own prayer lives. In between, in the daily life, is where they observe me. If I am seeking God wholeheartedly, they will too. If I am grouchy and distant, they  will be too. And when they are teenagers, they will either live that faith out, or walk out on their faith.

What are you doing to guide your sons into their teen years? Are they ready for their faith to meet their daily life?


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To Hide or to Guide

By on September 17, 2010 in Life Lessons

I was recently invited to join a new social network by one of my Twitter followers.  The site owners are calling it “The Christian Alternative to Twitter”. I took a look at it, but to be honest, I was not impressed. Can I be a transparent, soul-reaching Christian if I confine my online socializing to a strictly Christian forum?  We are living in this world to be lights in the darkness. I want my sons to be unafraid of the world, while boldly living out the lives that God has called them to.  Can I teach them how to be lights in the world, when they are never allowed to be there? The answer is no, of course not.

As Christians, we are to live in the world but not OF the world. We are choosing to raise our children to be able to live in the world as we know it, while also maintaining that our true citizenship is in Heaven. As my boys grow, I can see everything they must learn to navigate. Sometimes I wish that we could just hide them away, to keep them from being influenced by anything unhealthy. It is this thinking, of course, that is unhealthy–and unbiblical.

Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.” Matthew 28:19-20

As a homeschooling family, our boys already have the advantage of not being overly exposed to a lot of worldly things. That isn’t to say they are never exposed to real life; growing up literally IN the youth group definitely permits a lot of contact with the world. The difference is that it’s on our terms. I love to see my sweet sons notice an unhappy student. God gave our 10yo the gentlest spirit. He is so attentive to the way others are feeling.

I remember one time when  he was 7 he actually went up to the platform during altar time, and prayed for a 15 year old girl. We didn’t know her, or what she was going through, but my son could see she was really struggling with something and was very upset up there at the altar. And he prayed. Oh my boy prayed his little guts out for a girl he’d never seen before. It touched her so much that even now (as we know her quite well and love her even more) she and D1 have a special bond.

We aren’t called to hide our boys away, but to guide them… to guide them to obey everything that He has commanded… to love our neighbor as ourselves… to go and make disciples … because He is with us always.

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A Lesson from Mooshie (& a giveaway for YOU!)

By on August 17, 2010 in growing godly men, Life Lessons

I was in shock. I came down to tuck them in, but I never expected THIS. Our  earlier conversation came back to me. “Mom, we were playing with the mooshie pillow, and it… kind of got stuff all over.”  Mooshie pillow…. kind of…. uh-huh. This morning  I had given them the broom and dustpan to get the majority of the tiny styrofoam beans cleaned up, to be followed by the vacuum.  Somewhere in there, something went very wrong. When I went to tuck them in, I was walking on a fine layer of styrofoam.

Apparently D1 had scooped and D2 had vacuumed, but they didn’t tell me that the vacuum had sprayed the stuff behind him as he went… so what WAS a pile of beans ended up being a fine coating all over EVERYTHING. The walls, door, beds, bookshelf, everything.  The vacuum had become plugged up and was no longer sucking, but spraying. I got out a different vacuum and cleaned up what I could last night, leaving behind what looks like mini snowdrifts along the walls.

As  I tucked them in,  we talked about sin and how it relates to what went wrong in this situation. They made two bad choices: First, they were playing rough with the pillow in the first place, and second, when the vacuum acted up they didn’t come and ask for help. I pointed out how sin and pride are like that.  We first decide to DO the act, Whether with harmful intentions or not it was still a choice. Then things go wrong.  As a dear lady pastor friend of ours says, “Sin splatters”. What starts out as a small thing we think we can manage can quickly splatter all over the place. It affects everything we touch, and without asking for help, it quickly becomes unmanageable.

I asked them why they didn’t come and ask for help, and D1 said, “We thought we could take care of it ourselves.”

D2 responded, “We thought we might get in trouble.”

So typical of our pride: I can handle it, I don’t NEED anyone’s help, and besides that, someone might think poorly of me if they knew. And there may be consequences. In my sons’ minds it was all fine.  They acted like it was no big deal and forgot all about it, until bedtime. This is so much like the sin of pride.

As we prayed together, we thanked God for providing us his Son Jesus, to help us when we’re in a tough situation. Just as they should have come to me, I should always in turn lead them to the One who provides shelter and forgiveness from all sin. And as I walked upstairs, I wiped what styrofoam that I could from my legs.

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Today, each commenter will be entered to win a copy of God’s Promises for Boys, co-written by one of our very own MOB Society moms, Amy Parker, and published by Tommy Nelson.

Amy is graciously giving away three copies of her precious book that shares the eternal hope of God’s primises with the special little boys in your life.  No matter what issue they’re dealing with, your sons will find encouragement from the Word from this little book.  For example:

God’s Promises When…

  • You want to be cool…
  • You need help…
  • You need to be a good sport…
  • You feel lonely…
  • You need forgiveness…

Pick up your copy today by clicking on the link above or leave a comment now to enter to win a copy.  Either way, grab it!  Thanks Amy!

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Please take a moment to visit our new Prayer Room for boy moms in crisis.

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They Grew in My Heart

By on July 18, 2010 in connection with boys

“Oh, you adopted them through foster care?  So you’re not their real mother. What were their real mothers like?”

Why is adoption so difficult for people to understand? It is such a foreign concept to so many people. We get so many questions about the boys, their histories, and about how much they know of that history. I believe that kids need to feel normal. Adoption isn’t a sin, a skeleton to be hidden away, or anything to be ashamed of.  Even our sons understand that.

“Momma, tell me about when I came to your tummy”. D2 has such a way with words sometimes. He knew he didn’t grow IN my tummy, so he came TO my tummy. He was about 6 when he asked me that. He knows that God chose us for him, and him for us. He knows there was another momma, but doesn’t quite understand everything, nor would I expect him to. D1 knows too, that he was adopted. I told them, “the girls grew in my tummy, and you boys grew in my heart”. They know that we rejoice in the day we adopted each one of them, and that we are so thankful for them.

Sometimes at bedtime when we pray, they will ask me to tell them again the story of the day we picked each of them up from the hospital. They love to hear of how small they were, or chubby, or cute… it doesn’t matter. They love to hear the stories because it makes them feel special.  Adoption is special, because the Lord created it to be.

In love he predestined us to be adopted as his sons through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will. Eph. 1:4-5

God created adoption, and even his own Son was adopted by a father that was not his biologically.  Through Jesus Christ, we received adoption also into the family–and kingdom– of God. God chose us to be adopted, just as He chose our sons to be adopted by us. We receive all of the benefits of a natural born child  through our adoption into Christ, just as our sons do by their adoption into our family.

I know harder questions will come later, but for now, I just love to tell them their stories, reminding them how thankful to God we are for both of them. Do I look real to you? Then yes, I am their real mother.

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