Welcome to Titus Two Saturdays (TTS) at the MOB Society!
We know so many of you are desperately in need of an older mama to come alongside you and help you figure out how to love your husband well, serve your children, and take care of the responsibilities that come along with being a woman.
Doesn’t there seem to be a shortage of godly women stepping up to this role? Well, we’ve decided to bring together a team of amazing women willing to share their lives with those of us in the throes of young motherhood.
This week’s Question:
“I became a Christian 13 years ago (3 years after my husband and I got married). My husband is still a strong non-believer. We now have 3 sons, ages 4, 8 and 12. I adore my husband, but feel as though I am always overcompensating for my husbands lack of faith and always fighting for the hearts of my sons to know Jesus. It really affects so many of the conversations we have, whether they go to church with me or stay home with him on Sundays, etc. I pray for my husband’s salvation and that my sons would develop strong relationships with Jesus even though our home seems so divided. I feel exhausted from the constant spiritual battles. What can I do to continue the fight on a practical and spiritual level each day? I would love some words of wisdom and encouragement.”
How I would love to have a lingering conversation with you! You are right–your home is divided and it is a never-ending battle…but The Lord is using the situation and you! With him, there is always hope!
Remember that you are not alone. Christ is with you. The promise of the resurrection (and the command) is “Do not be afraid!” The Lord loves your husband and your boys more than you do, and he has a plan for their lives. He is at work, redeeming his fallen creation, even though you may not see it. Ask him to show you his fingerprints.
2 Peter 3:8-9 is a verse to cling to (among others in Scripture). God is not limited by time. The goal is godly men. Your job is to continue faithfully interceding and to provide a good role model. You are planting seeds. The Lord is responsible for the harvest, and you can trust him. Having a long vision gives hope.
Tend your marriage by finding as many areas of agreement with your husband as possible and focusing on those. Affirm him daily. Actively show respect for him to your sons and in public. Build up any godly characteristics you see in him, and do not let Satan use this as a wedge between you. Pray for discernment and wisdom–God will give it to you!
Your own daily walk matters. Make time for God’s Word and God’s people. Connect to a worshipping body where you can be nurtured and built up. God is using you in your home, but you will need support from others. Ask The Lord to send you a prayer partner–a woman who will walk with you, pray, and offer encouragement and perspective.
You are an inspiration of faith and courage! This is a difficult part of your journey, but the next step is all that is required of you today.
Scripture verse: 2 Peter 3:8-9
“But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With The Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”
Prayer: Lord, give this precious wife and mother the strength to let go and trust you with her loved ones, the perseverance to continue walking the godly path she’s on, and the joy and hope that comes only from you. Amen.
A Prayer of Surrender, by Richard Foster
Today, O Lord, I yield myself to You. Let your will be my delight today. Let your way hold perfect sway in me. Let your love be the pattern of my living…I surrender to you. My hopes. My dreams. My ambitions…Do with them what you will, when you will, as you will… I place into your hands my family, my friends, my future…Do for them more than I can ask or imagine…I release to you my need for control my craving for status. My fear of obscurity…Eradicate the evil.Purify the good.And bring your kingdom on earth.For Jesus’ sake…Amen
First, I love your heart, friend. Your desire to walk with God, honor your husband, and steer your precious boys to Christ comes through loud and clear. If you’ve ever canoed, you know it’s so hard when we’re paddling in different directions. It can feel like we’re totally confused, going nowhere or working against each other. I’m sure you know God can use your life to draw your husband to Himself, and we will pray that way with you! 1 Peter 3:1 says you’re an amazing force for bringing your husband to faith in Christ. But “what can I do to continue the fight on a practical and spiritual level each day?”For yourselfThe Lord Himself must be that well of strength & truth & love you need. You cannot afford to drift from Him, so walk with Him with tenacity. While your husband isn’t able to be your spiritual friend, you need spiritual friends to encourage you, hold you accountable, and uphold you. Put intentional, godly relationships in place around you. You need iron sharpening iron and hands to hold in prayer for when it’s hardest.With your husbandDo not give up. If God’s word is true (and it is), you are your husband’s greatest demonstration of Christ. He is watching. Though you love your man, don’t expect him to act like a Christ follower. Let him see the Jesus in you. Let God direct you in when to lovingly serve your man and when to let him feel the pain of life without Christ. Resist the urge to be his Savior, but let him see the Savior in you.
To your boys
Be honest with your boys, so they’ll see evidence of the truth you speak. Don’t hide reasons why you and your husband have different choices, but choose to be respectful about your man when you share. Your testimony of love you model towards their dad and to them will help them know that life with Jesus is a peaceful, blessed life. A life they want.
My mom knew Jesus before my dad. Life nearly imploded before God used the misery to make my dad reach out and look for answers. I was watching and listening, and I knew I wanted the Jesus life. A godly woman can be the catalyst for a lost husband to find Christ and the cause of her sons to grow into men of God.