About one month into engagement I was SO OVER being engaged. The Lord had brought to me the one that I was to spend the rest of my life with and, well, I was ready to start the rest of my life! I loved him and I knew that he loved me. I knew where we were going to live. I knew that I would go from “single” to “married”. But it wasn’t until I said “I do”, and we were pronounced husband and wife, did I become Mrs. Chris Orr.
Similarly, entering into a relationship with God isn’t just knowing about God. Satan knows all about God.
We must be careful not to solely fill our boys minds with the knowledge of God. We must teach them that only through faith in Christ can they have a relationship with God. Only through saying “I do” to trusting in God’s saving grace can we enter into fellowship with Him for eternity.

What having faith in Christ is not
- It is not praying a prayer. A heart’s cry is certainly the means by which they can express their faith in Christ, but repeating a prayer does not equal receiving God’s grace, through Christ.
- It is not having an emotional experience. Deep sorrow over our sin, granted by the Holy Spirit, is a big component that leads us to faith in Christ. However, a guilt-ridden, hell-fearing heart that is solely trying to make-up for their mess ups is not putting their faith in Christ. Instead, they are putting their faith in their own repentance, which is essentially works. If saying sorry for their sins and crying about it will appease the bad feelings they have over their sin, even if they are truly “sorry” for their sin, without faith in what Christ has done for them their “repentance” is worthless.
- It is not trying harder. When our children see their sin and their desperate need for God, we need to lead their sorrowful hearts to Jesus, not to trying better next time. Don’t give them more rules to follow, instead give them the example of Christ. The only answer to their sin problem is Jesus.
So, what do they need to have faith in?
- That God loves them very much; He is their loving creator and He has great plans for them.
- That God is holy and they are a sinner in desperate need of a Savior.
- That Jesus is the only way to a relationship with God.
- It is only through their faith, by God’s grace that they can enter into a relationship with God and spend eternity with Him.
Free Prayer Cards
There are three (free!) downloadable prayer cards, to help you in your efforts as we trust God for the salvation for our sons. You can find them here.
Tips for the journey
- Answer their questions. Encourage their inquisitiveness by giving them your full attention. This is the most important “research” they will do. When they bring up spiritual issues, stop what you are doing, look them in the eyes and answer them the best you can. It is ok to tell them, “You know what? I am not sure. But, this is a good and important question. Let’s ask our pastor this week and see what He thinks.”
- Ask them lots of questions. When they tell you they want to become a Christian, tell them that you are excited about that, but don’t jump right in and “pray the prayer”. Ask them what it means to be a Christian. Ask them why they want to be a Christian. Ask them how they think they can become a Christian. When you do this, listen well. Keep the main points of the gospel in mind and make sure they are understanding each point. I am certainly not saying that they have to know it all perfectly before they can genuinely come to Christ, nor am I advocating that you are the gate-keeper to whether or not they can become a Christian. You are their guide; God has given us the privilege and responsibility to point our children to Christ. If their definition of becoming a Christian does not involve their need for Christ because of their sin against a holy God, then their “prayer of faith” is not one of saving faith, but of moralism or fire-insurance.
- Point them to Jesus. Again and again and again. Jesus is the answer. He alone is our hope. I love the way Elyse Fitzpatrick puts it in her new book, Give Them Grace:
“Share the story [of grace] with your children. Show them the Savior. Show them Jesus. Dazzle them with His love.”
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Thanks for such a clear and well-written post! In our day and age, it takes real courage to stand for the Truth! May the Lord grant genuine repentance and faith to our sons, so that they will carry His gospel to the next generation!
Thank you, Sarah. Appreciate your encouragement.
“May the Lord grant genuine repentance and faith to our sons, so that they will carry His gospel to the next generation!”
Yes!!
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