As the mother of two boys, I can relate to the woman we meet in Matthew 20:20-28. She is the mother of James and John, two of Jesus’ closest disciples. This woman, called the wife of Zebedee, may have been Salome, a devoted follower of Jesus (according to The Woman’s Study Bible). She wanted the best for her two boys. She must have been proud they were Jesus’ disciples. And she may have heard Jesus’ teaching in Matthew 19:28, “So Jesus said to [His disciples], ‘Assuredly I say to you, that in the regeneration, when the Son of Man sits on the throne of His glory, you who have followed Me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel.’” Even if she didn’t hear it personally, it seems as if James and John told her about this promise.
This mother approached Jesus with a request. Matthew 20:21 says, “And He said to her, ‘What do you wish?’ She said to Him, ‘Grant that these two sons of mine may sit, one on Your right hand and the other on the left, in Your kingdom.’” When I was a Middle School English teacher, I had mothers meet with me and say, “My son really needs to be on the front row.” My husband, when he coached, had lots of moms asking for (or demanding) more playing time for their sons. All moms want what is best for their children. But this mother did not understand exactly what she was asking. In Jesus’ gentle way, He corrected her, and everyone learned an important lesson that day about following Christ.
The mother of these “Sons of Thunder” learned what a high cost it would be to attain this honor. James and John must have been near by because Jesus directed His answer to them. “Are you able to drink the cup that I am about to drink?” (v. 22). The cup He described was one of pain and suffering. In fact, in verses 18-19, Jesus had just described part of what would happen to Him. He would be mocked, scourged, and crucified. Out of ignorance or pride they answered, “We are able.” And we see from the whole of Scripture that they indeed suffered for Christ. James was the first apostle to be martyred (Acts 12:2) and John was a condemned exile on the island of Patmos (Rev. 1:9). Jesus went on to explain it was not for Him to choose who sits at His right and left, “It is for those for whom it has been prepared by My Father” (v. 23). Dr. John MacArthur writes, “Personal ambition is not a factor in the eternal, sovereign plan of God.”
Raising sons of thunder is not easy! If we want them to become fishers of men, we must learn the lesson Christ was teaching that day. Jesus is our example of servanthood. We must not seek our own glory, but do what is great in God’s eyes. This is the servant spirit of Christ. And just as Christ taught and modeled servanthood for His disciples, we much teach and model servanthood for our boys!
So, so lovely, Sandra! I never get over the fact that the Word of God is as applicable to us today as it was when it was written! Oh yes, ma’am!
When arguments erupt between my kids, I can often diffuse them by reminding them that in God’s eyes, whomever is first is last and last is first. That fact has halted many a fight!
Thank you so much for this!
.-= Kristen´s last blog ..I’ve Joined the M.O.B.! =-.
Oops…I meant to add that this advice is best used when the arguments are (for example) over one child wanting to be first at something or have the biggest piece of something!
.-= Kristen´s last blog ..I’ve Joined the M.O.B.! =-.
Kristen, I love that! My boys are always fighting about being the “line leader.” Some days I want to pick them both up under my arms and say “Neither of you gets to lead the line!” But teaching them a Biblical worldview is always better. Ahhhhh! I love this community! What an amazing way to wake up this morning…and be taught a new way to practically apply the Word in my boys hearts! Thank you Sandra!
I use this, too! The boys look at me like I’m crazy. I say, “It’s in the Bible. Look it up.” They usually take me at my word, but it does stop the argument!
.-= Rachel @ the science of music´s last blog ..Photo Hunt: Memorial =-.
Great post!! I so desire for my boys to have servants’ hearts. I pray that these works will sink into their heart and mind. Thanks for sharing!
Wow – “And just as Christ taught and modeled servanthood for His disciples, we much teach and model servanthood for our boys!”
I SO needed this reminder to model servanthood to my boys! I love this example of the mother of the “Sons of Thunder” and what her REAL requests SHOULD have been. I will be rereading those verses often as my boys grow and go on their way!
.-= Erin M.´s last blog ..One Month =-.
I really needed to hear MacArthur’s comment this morning – thank you! And now I need to go read again about this mother who wanted only the best for her sons. I have a feeling these will be verses I come back to frequently.
And can I just say that this community is awesome? I’m loving it! This is my first internet destination in the morning now. Thanks to everyone working on it for us!
.-= Megan´s last blog ..Summer Reading =-.
I love this Sandra~~ my son responds so well to scripture when I use analogies like being fishers of men…he loves the idea of waiting patiently and encouraging the “fish” and praying for the exact right time to “reel them in.” While he doesn’t always understand the meaning of servanthood and how it applies to others in his life (ESPECIALLY his sister! Ha!), we do our best to teach him that we must strive to model Christ’s behavior in all we think, say, and do.
A lot of our discipline centers around the gospel and the infamous “WWJD”. Our kids love that, wondering what Jesus would do in any given situation, and it has certainly let to great teachable moments as they have tried to figure out how they should act or react based on that condition.
Blessings,
Lindsey
.-= Lindsey @ A New Life´s last blog ..This Love =-.
What an excellent reminder to us moms who struggle to keep ourselves from pushing our kids to excel and pushing their teachers to make sure it happens. Following the lead of Christ and letting Him lead them rather than us force the issues, what a great challenge!
.-= Lisa-Jo @thegypsymama´s last blog ..You are more than your bathing suit =-.
Wow, aren’t most of us like this mother? Wanting what is best for our sons? But most of us, I doubt would be willing to allow them to go through the suffering and pain that James and John did. I wonder what went through her mind as she watched all they had to endure. I wonder if she ever wished she’d never made this request of Jesus? Or did she always know, no matter what, they were doing the “best thing”? Makes a mama wonder…
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Four of my grandfather’s brothers were in WWII. The Vietnam War ended just as my Dad was finishing high school. Our country has now been at war for more than eight years – since my oldest son was four years old. I remember thinking on those days that I was glad he was young. I now have five boys and my oldest is soon to be thirteen and this war is still not over. This oldest is a deep reader of history and has been drinking in biographies of great men. It makes a mom think – are we preparing them enough for what they may suffer – where God may lead them? I am very thankful that he is also drinking in The Word. Last year Mark and Acts and now he is deep in Romans. They may be Sons of Thunder, and usually they do sound like it, but I pray that they have the heart of Christ in reaching out to those around them, wherever that may be.
Amber Benton´s last [type] ..Rapt
Absolutely. So important to remind ourselves that the “Mama Best” isn’t always the “God Best”.
And that love isn’t pushing for success but servanthood.
<3
.-= Sara Sophia´s last blog ..Here comes the sun. =-.
So true!! I want my little guy to see Christ and and a spirit of servanthood in my life! Isn’t it exciting to think of our little boys becoming mighty men of God someday??
.-= Rachel´s last blog ..Wordless Wednesday…. =-.
So true! As mothers we want our kids to succeed, but for what? And for whom? WE must be the ones to lead to teach them that life is not about them, by showing them that we know it is not about US. Seeking glory for our kids is the same as seeking glory for ourselves. The One we should seek to glorify is Christ.
.-= Dawn´s last blog ..Ever Had One of THOSE Days? =-.
Wow! So convicting. Can you imagine watching your sons do something that would result in ridicule, suffering and misunderstanding? Faith and motherhood (parenthood) go hand-in-hand, but AAAAAGH, it’s tough sometimes! I always pray for God’s plan for my boys, but I frequently forget to pray for my own acceptance of that plan.
At the moment, I need to accept that nap time – apparently – is OVER for today. Time to go rescue the little one from his crib/baby jail.
I love that title, “Raising Sons of Thunder!” I have four boys and I have to say that they are definitely sons of thunder.
Blessings
Honey
I admit it is sometimes hard to think about being the example of servanthood when I’m just trying to keep the boys from hurting each other! This is so good!
.-= Jenny´s last blog ..Where’s Abby? =-.
I love this Sandra…what a great perspective to keep!
.-= Muthering Heights´s last blog ..I Can Already Tell =-.
woohoo! FULL RSS thank you!
yea, I liked the article too
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.-= monica @ paper bridges´s last blog ..Giveaway at Raising Homemakers =-.
As we pray for our boys, praying God’s will for them rather than our own is so important. Great post!
.-= Melissa Multitasking Mama´s last blog ..Overcoming the sense of entitlement =-.
Awesome post!